This is what my 5-year-old niece has figured out.
As my sister is driving...
Kid, "Mommy, is Mars a star?"
Sis: "No, it's a planet. You can see it sometimes in the sky though like you can see stars."
Kid: "Oh. Could we live on Mars?"
Sis: "Well no we couldn't because we would have trouble breathing."
Kid: "Oh so there must not be any trees on Mars because if there were trees, we would have oxygen and could breath."
oh.
muh.
gawd.
really??????????she's a genius.
Tuesday, September 4, 2012
Thursday, August 30, 2012
How to fix the economy...I have the secret
That's right--I know the secret to fixing the economy. The other day the boy and I got in a discussion about society and related ideas. The discussion involved how we think society should be and all the ways that it is silly.
Here's my idea on how to fix the economy. I know I have some pretty outlandish (so you say-psh) philosophies--things that would work in an ideal world, but not necessarily in reality. But, I think this might actually work.................if people would listen to me.
The economy would get better if we didn't spend so much time at work. Let it brew for minute--think about it--see! it makes sense! For those who don't get it, allow me to elaborate.
How much of your day is wasted while you are at work because you HAVE to be at work? (I'm talking about my salary workers. Hourly workers, I don't have a solution for you yet.)
Salary workers are typically expected to be at work 8-5 Monday through Friday or some other time frame.
And how many of those hours do you ACTUALLY do work? How many of those hours do you spend doing personal things or playing on facebook or texting or perusing Pinterest?
NO ONE DOES THAT, RIGHT????? wink wink wink wink wink.
There's no shame in that--it's impossible to work for 8-9 hours straight with no mental breaks-impossible and dangerous. You have to give your brain a break somewhere.
So honestly, out of the hours you spend at work each day, how many hours do you think you spend doing real work? Maybe half they day? 4 hours?
Now picture this:
Rather than staying at work for at least 8 hours every single day, we are only required to stay at work until we finish our work and then have an "on call" system when necessary for the rest of the business day. An outcomes-based system, if you will.
This would be beneficial for several reason:
1. Efficiency: employees would be more efficient at work. They wouldn't spend work time doing non-work things because they could go home to do non-work things.
2. Employer Resources: employees wouldn't be using work resources (i.e. computer) for non-work things. Also, this could even be extrapolated to the use of electricity and other utilities. If employees left work as soon as they finish, they wouldn't be using any employer resources.
3. Healthier America: If employees could leave work when they are finished (whether that is 2 hours or 6 hours), they'd end up having more of the day for free time. They could use this to work out, run errands, go shopping, cook dinner every night, etc. Think of how much healthier the population would be! We could work out more efficiently rather than skipping our workout or doing a piss-poor job at working out because we are tired. We would have the time to cook dinner every night. Oh the insanity!!
4. More time to spend money: With more spare time comes more time to spend money. How many times have you not gone out to do something because you were tired and wanted to stay home on your couch? Think of how we would go shopping more often, go to the movies more often, enjoy life more often!
It all makes sense. We'd be getting the same amount of work done and be at work less allowing us to enjoy life more. We'd be more alert at work because we'd get more sleep and be more efficient in our outcomes.
Who's with me?? How do we make this happen? I need to talk to someone important stat...
Here's my idea on how to fix the economy. I know I have some pretty outlandish (so you say-psh) philosophies--things that would work in an ideal world, but not necessarily in reality. But, I think this might actually work.................if people would listen to me.
The economy would get better if we didn't spend so much time at work. Let it brew for minute--think about it--see! it makes sense! For those who don't get it, allow me to elaborate.
How much of your day is wasted while you are at work because you HAVE to be at work? (I'm talking about my salary workers. Hourly workers, I don't have a solution for you yet.)
Salary workers are typically expected to be at work 8-5 Monday through Friday or some other time frame.
And how many of those hours do you ACTUALLY do work? How many of those hours do you spend doing personal things or playing on facebook or texting or perusing Pinterest?
NO ONE DOES THAT, RIGHT????? wink wink wink wink wink.
There's no shame in that--it's impossible to work for 8-9 hours straight with no mental breaks-impossible and dangerous. You have to give your brain a break somewhere.
So honestly, out of the hours you spend at work each day, how many hours do you think you spend doing real work? Maybe half they day? 4 hours?
Now picture this:
Rather than staying at work for at least 8 hours every single day, we are only required to stay at work until we finish our work and then have an "on call" system when necessary for the rest of the business day. An outcomes-based system, if you will.
This would be beneficial for several reason:
1. Efficiency: employees would be more efficient at work. They wouldn't spend work time doing non-work things because they could go home to do non-work things.
2. Employer Resources: employees wouldn't be using work resources (i.e. computer) for non-work things. Also, this could even be extrapolated to the use of electricity and other utilities. If employees left work as soon as they finish, they wouldn't be using any employer resources.
3. Healthier America: If employees could leave work when they are finished (whether that is 2 hours or 6 hours), they'd end up having more of the day for free time. They could use this to work out, run errands, go shopping, cook dinner every night, etc. Think of how much healthier the population would be! We could work out more efficiently rather than skipping our workout or doing a piss-poor job at working out because we are tired. We would have the time to cook dinner every night. Oh the insanity!!
4. More time to spend money: With more spare time comes more time to spend money. How many times have you not gone out to do something because you were tired and wanted to stay home on your couch? Think of how we would go shopping more often, go to the movies more often, enjoy life more often!
It all makes sense. We'd be getting the same amount of work done and be at work less allowing us to enjoy life more. We'd be more alert at work because we'd get more sleep and be more efficient in our outcomes.
Who's with me?? How do we make this happen? I need to talk to someone important stat...
Tuesday, August 7, 2012
Best. Email. Ever.
I received an email today--quite possibly the best email I've ever gotten. Definitely the most intriguing.
"Hi Auntie:
I really love you and miss you. I like the calendar and card and i love everything you gave me.
Love,
[The Kid]"
Things to note:
The Kid just turned 5 years old.
This came from her personal email account.
She's five.
This came from her personal email account that was written on her personal tablet.
She's fiiiiiiivvvvvvvvveeeeeeeee.
I'm highly confused and yet impressed by this event. Here's the kicker...both her Mom and Nana were at work when this email was sent. So now the question remains...who the aych-eee-double-hockey-sticks typed for her???
I don't even care. My level of amusement, intrigue, and delight from this event trump any desire to answer that question. I look forward to more emails and might start writing a book from them.
Monday, July 30, 2012
Convo with the Kid
Kids are hilarious. Think of how interesting the world would be if we were all uncensored like children. They come up with the greatest statements--insightful most of the time, irrational the rest of the time.
The Kid is great. I had a 2 hour conversation with her the other day in which I spoke maybe a total of 10 words. She was just chattin away. I don't know half of what she was talking about. At one point she got on this topic: what to do if someone has lost their puppy or kitten.
Kid: "So Auntie, if someone loses their puppy or kitten, I should not help them because they might steal me and then I could end up dead."
Me: "What have you been watching?"
Kid: "Nothing. I was just thinking that I should be careful. Because I'm cute. And people might want to take me. So I should only help someone I know. Like if Mommy's friend Beth loses her kitten...she doesn't have a kitten...but if she bought a kitten and then lost it, then I could help her look for him because I know Beth and I play with Beth's daughter..."
Me: "Oh you do? How do you know that she would buy a boy kitten?"
Kid: "She would."
Me: "Okay."
Kid: "So is that right? I should only help people I know."
Me: "How about this: you only help Mommy or Nana or me look for any puppy or kitten that we might lose. Anyone else, you say no."
Kid: "But what if they REALLLLLLY need help."
Me: "I'm bigger than you and can tell you what to do. Just say no."
Kid: "I'll be taller than you someday."
Me: "Have you been talking to your mother lately."
Kid: "Auntie, I talk to my mudder everyday. I talk to your mudder everyday too. True story."
...yes I taught my niece to say True Story. It's awesome...
Then I said I had to go because I had a date with the Boy and had to take a shower. She was not happy about this.
Kid: "Auntie who is he?"
Me: "He's my boyfriend."
Kid: "Why?"
Me: "Because."
Kid: "Because isn't an answer." (damn myself for ever using that as a response to her!!)
Me: "Well because I want him to be."
Kid: ....silence..."My foot hurts."
Me: "Are you not happy about this?"
Kid: "I don't care. My foot hurts. Call me back when you get out of the shower, okay?"
Me: "Okay."
Kid: "Do you promise? You have to promise to call me back."
Me: "Yes baby, I'll call you back."
Shower...start to put clothes on...maybe 25 minutes has passed.
Cell phone rings...caller ID reads "Mom"...my brain: I'll call her back when I'm ready.
Phone IMMEDIATELY rings again...caller ID reads "Mom"...my brain: something must be wrong, she only calls twice in a row if something is wrong.
Me: "Hello?"
Kid: "YOU DIDN'T CALL ME BACK!!"
Me: "I was getting dressed."
Kid: "Oh. well you said you would call me back when you got out of the shower. What are you going to wear? You should wear red. It's your best color. Or black...it's slimming."
Me: "Do you even know what slimming means?"
Kid: "No."
Me: "Okay I'm gonna get dressed."
Kid: "Wait, guess what?"
Me: "What?"
Kid: "Chicken Butt."
Me: "Okay kid. I love you. I'll call you back."
Really??? She's awesome.
Disclaimer: This conversation happened a few days ago so it is not exact, but it's as close to accurate as possible. She really does talk like this. Smartest kid I know.
The Kid is great. I had a 2 hour conversation with her the other day in which I spoke maybe a total of 10 words. She was just chattin away. I don't know half of what she was talking about. At one point she got on this topic: what to do if someone has lost their puppy or kitten.
Kid: "So Auntie, if someone loses their puppy or kitten, I should not help them because they might steal me and then I could end up dead."
Me: "What have you been watching?"
Kid: "Nothing. I was just thinking that I should be careful. Because I'm cute. And people might want to take me. So I should only help someone I know. Like if Mommy's friend Beth loses her kitten...she doesn't have a kitten...but if she bought a kitten and then lost it, then I could help her look for him because I know Beth and I play with Beth's daughter..."
Me: "Oh you do? How do you know that she would buy a boy kitten?"
Kid: "She would."
Me: "Okay."
Kid: "So is that right? I should only help people I know."
Me: "How about this: you only help Mommy or Nana or me look for any puppy or kitten that we might lose. Anyone else, you say no."
Kid: "But what if they REALLLLLLY need help."
Me: "I'm bigger than you and can tell you what to do. Just say no."
Kid: "I'll be taller than you someday."
Me: "Have you been talking to your mother lately."
Kid: "Auntie, I talk to my mudder everyday. I talk to your mudder everyday too. True story."
...yes I taught my niece to say True Story. It's awesome...
Then I said I had to go because I had a date with the Boy and had to take a shower. She was not happy about this.
Kid: "Auntie who is he?"
Me: "He's my boyfriend."
Kid: "Why?"
Me: "Because."
Kid: "Because isn't an answer." (damn myself for ever using that as a response to her!!)
Me: "Well because I want him to be."
Kid: ....silence..."My foot hurts."
Me: "Are you not happy about this?"
Kid: "I don't care. My foot hurts. Call me back when you get out of the shower, okay?"
Me: "Okay."
Kid: "Do you promise? You have to promise to call me back."
Me: "Yes baby, I'll call you back."
Shower...start to put clothes on...maybe 25 minutes has passed.
Cell phone rings...caller ID reads "Mom"...my brain: I'll call her back when I'm ready.
Phone IMMEDIATELY rings again...caller ID reads "Mom"...my brain: something must be wrong, she only calls twice in a row if something is wrong.
Me: "Hello?"
Kid: "YOU DIDN'T CALL ME BACK!!"
Me: "I was getting dressed."
Kid: "Oh. well you said you would call me back when you got out of the shower. What are you going to wear? You should wear red. It's your best color. Or black...it's slimming."
Me: "Do you even know what slimming means?"
Kid: "No."
Me: "Okay I'm gonna get dressed."
Kid: "Wait, guess what?"
Me: "What?"
Kid: "Chicken Butt."
Me: "Okay kid. I love you. I'll call you back."
Really??? She's awesome.
Disclaimer: This conversation happened a few days ago so it is not exact, but it's as close to accurate as possible. She really does talk like this. Smartest kid I know.
Friday, July 13, 2012
The Kid
My. Niece. Is. The. Best. Child. Ever. Sorry to you readers who have kids and think that your kid is the best. You're wrong. My niece is hilarious. My one regret in life is that I have not written down every funny thing she has said over the last 4 years. Her personality is like mine, except she has a mean streak so it's even funnier cause SHE IS FOUR and already sassy as hell!
First, she's smarter than most adults I know. She reasons through things so quickly in her head. Not to mention she's adorable. Blonde hair, bright blue eyes--
I've decided from now on, I'm writing things she says down. Granted, it's funnier when I repeat it in person because they I can demonstrate how sassy and animated she is. But alas, herein lies the woes of the written word.
So my niece's funny lines from last weekend:
"Auntie, I can get a donut from Dunkin Donuts, right? Because I'm not diabetes."
...no Kid, you are not the personification of a debilitating disease.
"Now, remember, you can't wear perfume in the summer if you go outside because it attracts bees. It's important."
...thank you for my random common sense fact of the day, kid.
My favorite from the past. Allow me to set up the scene. My family was going on a Disney Cruise and the Kid was trying to convince me to come. It didn't work because those bee eye tee see ayches are expensive.
"Auntie, you HAVE to come. You know why? You need to go swimming with me. Nana won't go and Mommy can't go because she might get kicked in the belly by a dolphin and get an infection."
...because dolphin kicks are the number 1 cause of infection nationwide--in the Kid's world.
True.Story. which is another line I have taught her, along with how to pound it and "that's what she said"--even though that one is not always at the correct time comedically speaking. Google doesn't like the word comedically but I'm going to use it anyway.
Unrelated to my niece, my name is apparently now Jack Dani to some of the west coast swing world. When I consume Jack Daniels, my alter-ego comes out--Jack Dani. Let me tell you a little about Jack Dani:
1. she's awesome.
2. she gets thug sometimes. aka she thinks she is thug and says silly things like "Jack Dani in da houuuuuuuuuse."
3. no it's not normal and I'm fully aware of this.
4. she likes to stand on things that make her taller.
5. she is able to flawlessly carry the beverage without spilling it.
6. people constantly laugh around her.
7. she thinks she is a much better dancer than she is actually dancing at that time.
8. she craves Nutella.
9. she thinks she's invincible.
10. she's basically my current personality, but amplified.
I will update this list as I become more aware of what actually happens.
First, she's smarter than most adults I know. She reasons through things so quickly in her head. Not to mention she's adorable. Blonde hair, bright blue eyes--
Dear current 4-8-year-old little boys,
I will cause you serious pain if you hurt my niece 10 years from now. The wrath of Dani will come out--you will see the Hulk. Yes, it's a threat.
With deepest regards,
the Aunt who will beat you up
I've decided from now on, I'm writing things she says down. Granted, it's funnier when I repeat it in person because they I can demonstrate how sassy and animated she is. But alas, herein lies the woes of the written word.
So my niece's funny lines from last weekend:
"Auntie, I can get a donut from Dunkin Donuts, right? Because I'm not diabetes."
...no Kid, you are not the personification of a debilitating disease.
"Now, remember, you can't wear perfume in the summer if you go outside because it attracts bees. It's important."
...thank you for my random common sense fact of the day, kid.
My favorite from the past. Allow me to set up the scene. My family was going on a Disney Cruise and the Kid was trying to convince me to come. It didn't work because those bee eye tee see ayches are expensive.
"Auntie, you HAVE to come. You know why? You need to go swimming with me. Nana won't go and Mommy can't go because she might get kicked in the belly by a dolphin and get an infection."
...because dolphin kicks are the number 1 cause of infection nationwide--in the Kid's world.
True.Story. which is another line I have taught her, along with how to pound it and "that's what she said"--even though that one is not always at the correct time comedically speaking. Google doesn't like the word comedically but I'm going to use it anyway.
Unrelated to my niece, my name is apparently now Jack Dani to some of the west coast swing world. When I consume Jack Daniels, my alter-ego comes out--Jack Dani. Let me tell you a little about Jack Dani:
1. she's awesome.
2. she gets thug sometimes. aka she thinks she is thug and says silly things like "Jack Dani in da houuuuuuuuuse."
3. no it's not normal and I'm fully aware of this.
4. she likes to stand on things that make her taller.
5. she is able to flawlessly carry the beverage without spilling it.
6. people constantly laugh around her.
7. she thinks she is a much better dancer than she is actually dancing at that time.
8. she craves Nutella.
9. she thinks she's invincible.
10. she's basically my current personality, but amplified.
I will update this list as I become more aware of what actually happens.
Tuesday, July 3, 2012
You know life is good when...
...random, crappy things keep happening to you and it doesn't get ya down. List of crappy things in 3..2..1..
Alright all my pessimistic readers, prepare yourself to figuratively vomit by how awesome I am:
1. Basically, I'm a combination of Robin and Barney. True story.
2. It's summer.
3. I quote HIMYM and the Office on a regular basis. Life can't get much better than that.
4. My friends are like Nutella/peanut butter/banana sandwiches. ALWAYS AWESOME.
5. I get to see my Ma and the Kid in a day (That's my niece--who is basically the best little person on the planet. (She's 4-years-old, not a midget. is that how you spell it? is that politically correct? do i care? all valid questions.))
Wow, I just pulled a double inner monologue. Niiiiiiiiiice.
6. I managed to find a pretty awesome dude who is a bigger dork than I am and just as funny. Alright, ALMOST as funny. ;) No he's definitely funnier than I am. But my boobs are bigger! hah! I win! (Refer to previous post for my theory on boobs.)
7. It's summer. Need I really say more about this?
8. My last dance competition was rather successful...6th place. holler ballers.
9. It's summer. I can wear shorts. I like shorts. a. lot.
10. I went skydiving a month or so ago. Well indoor skydiving. And I'm pretty Bee-Ay.
11. I've done a few other adventurous things that I won't share on a public forum.
12. I have a fantastic new apartment and even better new roommate (Teach from previous posts).
13. I'm training for a Half Marathon (now that I've put it on a public forum--I can't back out. Part of my strategy).
14. My hair is pretty when it wants to be. It has a mind of its own, like my eyebrows.
15. I got my first flapper...flipper?...forgot what its called from bouldering the other day. Apparently, that means I'm a real climber. I may or may not have made that vocabulary term up. Jury's out.
16. I have a blog. Blogging=the final step to becoming awesome
Sum(1-15)=Awesomely fantastical life. Only Barney Stinson uses the word awesome more often than I do. Thank you NPH. Your welcome Universe.
Who actually googled "fantastical"? Pretty sure I made it up.
- There was the whole car-towing debacle. Mia the Kia is fixed now, but I'm still waiting on payment from the completely deranged towing company.
- Another recent disaster happened with Mia. It's my fault this time (about time something happened to my car that was actually my own fault). Ugh. I'm an idiot. I don't want to talk about it even though I'm fully aware that I am posting this statement on a public forum. No, I still don't want to talk about it.
- I'm waiting on the third bad thing to happen. (Don't bad things happen in 3's? Maybe Andy Griffith dying was the 3rd bad thing? Can I make that my 3rd bad thing? How does the bad thing in 3's work? Have I asked enough questions to the universe yet?)
- My right hip has been being silly lately and deciding it wants to cause me pain.
- My right ankle always causes me pain because it hates me.
- My left big toe has decided that it no longer wants me to feel it, and it has gone partially numb. no big deal.
- According to the doctor, I have the beginning of an ulcer. I'm supposed to decrease my stress or I'm going to get a full-blown ulcer. My way of decreasing stress is doing more fun things...it's working :)
Alright all my pessimistic readers, prepare yourself to figuratively vomit by how awesome I am:
1. Basically, I'm a combination of Robin and Barney. True story.
2. It's summer.
3. I quote HIMYM and the Office on a regular basis. Life can't get much better than that.
4. My friends are like Nutella/peanut butter/banana sandwiches. ALWAYS AWESOME.
5. I get to see my Ma and the Kid in a day (That's my niece--who is basically the best little person on the planet. (She's 4-years-old, not a midget. is that how you spell it? is that politically correct? do i care? all valid questions.))
Wow, I just pulled a double inner monologue. Niiiiiiiiiice.
6. I managed to find a pretty awesome dude who is a bigger dork than I am and just as funny. Alright, ALMOST as funny. ;) No he's definitely funnier than I am. But my boobs are bigger! hah! I win! (Refer to previous post for my theory on boobs.)
7. It's summer. Need I really say more about this?
8. My last dance competition was rather successful...6th place. holler ballers.
9. It's summer. I can wear shorts. I like shorts. a. lot.
10. I went skydiving a month or so ago. Well indoor skydiving. And I'm pretty Bee-Ay.
11. I've done a few other adventurous things that I won't share on a public forum.
12. I have a fantastic new apartment and even better new roommate (Teach from previous posts).
13. I'm training for a Half Marathon (now that I've put it on a public forum--I can't back out. Part of my strategy).
14. My hair is pretty when it wants to be. It has a mind of its own, like my eyebrows.
15. I got my first flapper...flipper?...forgot what its called from bouldering the other day. Apparently, that means I'm a real climber. I may or may not have made that vocabulary term up. Jury's out.
16. I have a blog. Blogging=the final step to becoming awesome
Sum(1-15)=Awesomely fantastical life. Only Barney Stinson uses the word awesome more often than I do. Thank you NPH. Your welcome Universe.
Who actually googled "fantastical"? Pretty sure I made it up.
Tuesday, June 5, 2012
The Adventures of Moving
Well gangsters, I'm officially an unofficial resident of Watertown now. Natick will only be visited if I need a trip to the mall. Just a little background: When I moved up here (by here, I mean the arctic), I wasn't planning on traffic being disastrous. In TN, it takes no more than 30 minutes to go 17 miles. So logically, I was an idiot and decided living 17 miles from work wasn't all that bad. It took me over an hour on some days to get to work. And then with my grueling dance schedule, I'd be driving home at 11:30/12. That late it would take me 30 minutes; but 30 minutes when your exhausted is a very long time. Absurd. Therefore, I decided to move closer to work and dance and the city with one of my awesome dance friends. We'll call her Teach (because she's a middle school teacher and has this ability to always teach me some random fact or give the "teacher disapproval" that makes you feel so bad about yourself...I'm not that creative.) So Teach and I find this close-to-perfect apartment for us in Watertown. Great location for us both. Nice size (living room is a little small but beggars can't be choosers). Parking (ha! I'll get to that). A running trail about 2 seconds from our front door (slight under-aggeration). A few downsides--but the upsides outweigh them.
So if you know me even a little bit, you know that I'm very organized. I can be impulsive about things (shhhh don't judge); but for the most part, I plan well in advance for big things like...oh...moving all of my belongings in 1 day.
Without going into too much detail, I was proactive with this as well. Teach and I tried our best to plan way far in advance with the realtor (we shall call him EffHead because that's what I have named him) so that things would run smoothly. Shortly before we moved in, all these random additional fees kept popping up. One of them was a $50 charge to "lease" the parking pass. We just thought, 'that's silly and messed up that they didn't tell us at first. but oh well, we get it back when we move out in a few years.' Then we find out that we actually only get 1 spot until September 1st. Well this is a problem because we both drive our cars everywhere. Perfect. That's convenient, EffHead. I tried to contact EffHead 2 weeks prior to the move to coordinate a time to pick up the keys and parking pass; he did not respond. He's so good at his job. So the day before the move, I'm still trying to contact this man to set up a time to get the keys. It's a busy day because I have to pick up my friend (we'll call him Hulk...I had several other options for a nickname but this one won because of his crazy moving abilities and the fact that we both have a strange affinity for the Hulk after seeing Avengers), pick up the moving truck, load the truck, unload the truck, return the truck, etc. So EffHead finally responds and basically tells me that I have to meet him at 9am at the apartment because he is too busy and his schedule is full. I argue for a while because that's ridonk. But it ends up working out (and by working out, I mean I drove to meet him at his office just to drive back to Natick to get the truck and load it). EffHead was also supposed to get the parking pass and lease to me when he gave me the keys. He didn't. I paid for it. He told me since they have my registration information, my car would be fine. Proof is important. I have a receipt (although it doesn't help me much in this story).
So the actual move was surprisingly amusing. Hulk carried most of the heavy things by himself after he realized that my little (wo)man syndrome is just that...a syndrome. I'm not nearly as strong as I think I am. Hulk carried the tv by himself, the boxspring by himself, the table by himself. Just silly. Hulk found great amusement out of watching me attempt to carry things. He even suggested I pull the mattress up the stairs. This process ended with me conquering 3 stairs (great success) and ending on my badonkadonk. Well played, Hulk. Well played.
I go on with my weekend as normal. A lot of dancing and unpacking (and a random stint of indoor skydiving--impulsive-ish act--which is phenomenally fun and I'm kind of awesome at. Think it's the small, dancer thing. Flexible back and such. I'm definitely doing the real thing.) I digress.
Let's jump to Sunday night. Watching HIMYM with Teach. I hear a truck in our parking lot, and think, 'trucks don't fit back there.' I immediately get up and see my car on the back of a tow truck. Teach is calm and I am not so thank God she was there. I ended up having to pay the dudes $50 to get them to put my car down. This is after I became hysterical and had minor heart palpitations (I'm dramatic). Teach and I email EffHead the next day basically saying we expect reimbursement and how disappointed we are with the services. EffHead is even more of a scumbag so Teach jumps in with her "teacher disapproval" methods and makes him feel like a horrible person (we hope...he never responded. hehe). On top of all that, the towers threw my alignment off. Awwwwwwwwwesome.
So to recap: EffHead is a d-bag. I'm down 50 bucks because EffHead thinks it's not his fault in his own little scummy fantasy land. My alignment is off, but I can't do anything about it other than just pay to get it fixed because I have no proof it was straight before the towers decided to play with my car like it was a Hot Wheels. And thanks to Teach, I now have my parking pass.
Word to the wise, if you are ever moving in the Boston area, pass the realtor's name by me or Teach first. If it's EffHead, we'll let you know.
So if you know me even a little bit, you know that I'm very organized. I can be impulsive about things (shhhh don't judge); but for the most part, I plan well in advance for big things like...oh...moving all of my belongings in 1 day.
Without going into too much detail, I was proactive with this as well. Teach and I tried our best to plan way far in advance with the realtor (we shall call him EffHead because that's what I have named him) so that things would run smoothly. Shortly before we moved in, all these random additional fees kept popping up. One of them was a $50 charge to "lease" the parking pass. We just thought, 'that's silly and messed up that they didn't tell us at first. but oh well, we get it back when we move out in a few years.' Then we find out that we actually only get 1 spot until September 1st. Well this is a problem because we both drive our cars everywhere. Perfect. That's convenient, EffHead. I tried to contact EffHead 2 weeks prior to the move to coordinate a time to pick up the keys and parking pass; he did not respond. He's so good at his job. So the day before the move, I'm still trying to contact this man to set up a time to get the keys. It's a busy day because I have to pick up my friend (we'll call him Hulk...I had several other options for a nickname but this one won because of his crazy moving abilities and the fact that we both have a strange affinity for the Hulk after seeing Avengers), pick up the moving truck, load the truck, unload the truck, return the truck, etc. So EffHead finally responds and basically tells me that I have to meet him at 9am at the apartment because he is too busy and his schedule is full. I argue for a while because that's ridonk. But it ends up working out (and by working out, I mean I drove to meet him at his office just to drive back to Natick to get the truck and load it). EffHead was also supposed to get the parking pass and lease to me when he gave me the keys. He didn't. I paid for it. He told me since they have my registration information, my car would be fine. Proof is important. I have a receipt (although it doesn't help me much in this story).
So the actual move was surprisingly amusing. Hulk carried most of the heavy things by himself after he realized that my little (wo)man syndrome is just that...a syndrome. I'm not nearly as strong as I think I am. Hulk carried the tv by himself, the boxspring by himself, the table by himself. Just silly. Hulk found great amusement out of watching me attempt to carry things. He even suggested I pull the mattress up the stairs. This process ended with me conquering 3 stairs (great success) and ending on my badonkadonk. Well played, Hulk. Well played.
I go on with my weekend as normal. A lot of dancing and unpacking (and a random stint of indoor skydiving--impulsive-ish act--which is phenomenally fun and I'm kind of awesome at. Think it's the small, dancer thing. Flexible back and such. I'm definitely doing the real thing.) I digress.
Let's jump to Sunday night. Watching HIMYM with Teach. I hear a truck in our parking lot, and think, 'trucks don't fit back there.' I immediately get up and see my car on the back of a tow truck. Teach is calm and I am not so thank God she was there. I ended up having to pay the dudes $50 to get them to put my car down. This is after I became hysterical and had minor heart palpitations (I'm dramatic). Teach and I email EffHead the next day basically saying we expect reimbursement and how disappointed we are with the services. EffHead is even more of a scumbag so Teach jumps in with her "teacher disapproval" methods and makes him feel like a horrible person (we hope...he never responded. hehe). On top of all that, the towers threw my alignment off. Awwwwwwwwwesome.
So to recap: EffHead is a d-bag. I'm down 50 bucks because EffHead thinks it's not his fault in his own little scummy fantasy land. My alignment is off, but I can't do anything about it other than just pay to get it fixed because I have no proof it was straight before the towers decided to play with my car like it was a Hot Wheels. And thanks to Teach, I now have my parking pass.
Word to the wise, if you are ever moving in the Boston area, pass the realtor's name by me or Teach first. If it's EffHead, we'll let you know.
Thursday, May 17, 2012
Parental discretion advised
Boobs are good for so many things...yes, I went there slash am going there...
I was just eating my daily pre-lunch apple (okay, so it's only daily on the days I remember), and I demolished it. For real, I ate every piece of actual apple on it and only left the core. It was delicious.
Apparently my system got overloaded with pectin (if you don't know, just google it. google knows everything.), and I threw the core...at myself. Okay so it slipped out of my hand and I dropped it. Here's where the good part comes in...it fell perfectly into/on my bosom!! I really should have taken a picture for proof. It was genuinely amazing the way it just landed right there. I'm impressed with my subconscious self.
There are so many instances when the twins infuriate me: while running, while dancing to fast songs, when I get excited and can't control the urge to jump up and down. But man they are convenient. It definitely saved me from having to wash my work pants sooner than I planned. Because let's not lie, pants don't get dirty just by wearing them. You only need to wash them when you spill something on yourself, sweat obnoxiously after a scorching night of dancing, or when you realize they've stretched so much they are actually a size bigger. So my shirts might get stains on them when I miss my mouth while eating something or when my mouth mysterically (I think I just made this word up...but I'm goin' with it.) grows a gaping hole and the food just falls right out. But at least it keeps my pants clean! Score.
They also help me out in other situations. For example, drinks. I don't drink nearly as much as I did in my glory days (i.e. the debacle that was college), but all I gotta do is lean on the bar a little and voila! Jack Daniels for Dani! Okay so it's not that easy--and it doesn't always work--but it's about a 23.64% success rate. (I never just make up numbers--no big deal.)
Some of you have heard my "Everybody loves boobs" philosophy. If you haven't, I'll tell you another time because it's time to wrap this show up. So in summary, this event is evidence that every person on this planet loves and/or appreciates boobs because of just the few uses I mentioned. They might piss us well-endowed women off quite often, but we appreciate their presence. :-D
I was just eating my daily pre-lunch apple (okay, so it's only daily on the days I remember), and I demolished it. For real, I ate every piece of actual apple on it and only left the core. It was delicious.
Apparently my system got overloaded with pectin (if you don't know, just google it. google knows everything.), and I threw the core...at myself. Okay so it slipped out of my hand and I dropped it. Here's where the good part comes in...it fell perfectly into/on my bosom!! I really should have taken a picture for proof. It was genuinely amazing the way it just landed right there. I'm impressed with my subconscious self.
There are so many instances when the twins infuriate me: while running, while dancing to fast songs, when I get excited and can't control the urge to jump up and down. But man they are convenient. It definitely saved me from having to wash my work pants sooner than I planned. Because let's not lie, pants don't get dirty just by wearing them. You only need to wash them when you spill something on yourself, sweat obnoxiously after a scorching night of dancing, or when you realize they've stretched so much they are actually a size bigger. So my shirts might get stains on them when I miss my mouth while eating something or when my mouth mysterically (I think I just made this word up...but I'm goin' with it.) grows a gaping hole and the food just falls right out. But at least it keeps my pants clean! Score.
They also help me out in other situations. For example, drinks. I don't drink nearly as much as I did in my glory days (i.e. the debacle that was college), but all I gotta do is lean on the bar a little and voila! Jack Daniels for Dani! Okay so it's not that easy--and it doesn't always work--but it's about a 23.64% success rate. (I never just make up numbers--no big deal.)
Some of you have heard my "Everybody loves boobs" philosophy. If you haven't, I'll tell you another time because it's time to wrap this show up. So in summary, this event is evidence that every person on this planet loves and/or appreciates boobs because of just the few uses I mentioned. They might piss us well-endowed women off quite often, but we appreciate their presence. :-D
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
Maturity? nahhhhh
Well, I believe I've hit another milestone in life. Emotional maturity. Okay, let's not lie, no one will ever reach complete emotional maturity (who would want to? pshhh).
After this past week, I realized that I'm far further on the road that is referred to as Emotional Maturity than I thought. This realization came when a very dear friend, probably my best friend up here in the land of penguins and Eskimos*, lied to me about something very important. Both myself and a 3rd person who were involved in this just plain ridiculous situation were strangely mature about it. Even just 2 years ago, I would have flipped out and gone crazy. But instead I was irrationally calm; I didn't even know why I was so calm while I was being calm. I mean don't get me wrong, I definitely had my mild outburst of violence after letting the whole situation settle. 2% of the time, my punches actually inflict pain--winning! But, initially and even now, I can only see the situation in a rational way and learn from it. I'm still #@$(%$&# pissed and disappointed, but life is too short to dwell on things you can neither control nor change. So you might as well learn from them, try your damnedest to forgive, and move on a stronger woman (or man--whichever is reading this--if anyone). I really wish I could document what happened on here, but both of the other two people involved are great friends and I don't want to do that to them. Just know it's a good one--we'll leave it at that.
So back to this emotional maturity nonsense. Most of you know I tend to act like a...well...12-year-old boy. That's what she said jokes are probably my favorite thing on the planet. I say inappropriate things when appropriate (figure that one out). Basically the main differences between me and your average 12-year-old boy are that I don't think my best friend's big sister is hot (because I am that big sister type that 12-year-old boys love for some reason), I've already gone through puberty (praise baby Jesus!), and I don't smell perpetually bad (unless I'm wearing a hat--you know I haven't showered if I'm wearing a hat).
So I like to have fun. I like to do and say silly things and act a fool. I like to ride rollercoasters and scream at the top of my lungs. I find fainting goats hilarious and am pretty sure I could spend an entire day on youtube watching America's Funniest Home Videos clips and laughing babies and funny animals. But somehow I'm still able to be professional at work, am able to have intellectual conversations with adults, somehow have intellectual conversations with my niece (genius child), and have real relationships with people. This has made me ponder: how is it possible that I can carry on a normal life as a real person and yet still be my ridonkulous, goofy self 99% of the time? I still don't know the answer to the question, but I'll keep the "kid at heart" thing going anyway--it works on me. But after this past week, I'm happy to know that I'm emotionally mature and stable. It's quite comforting to know that after some of the cow poop (i genuinely wanted to use an alternate set of covabulary**) that people have done, I can still walk away a stronger woman. Go Dani!! I get a cookie...or not...because I'm on one of my healthy eating kicks...guhhhh.
Done and done.
*Yes I know summer is coming and Boston is awesome in the summer. But I'm from TN--I'm allowed to make arctic and Eskimo jokes for anything farther north than the Mason Dixon line.
**regarding my new word I just created. That was a typo. I went back and fixed it initially, but then realized that's awesome and Webster's should adopt it. I'm going to be a billionaire after that one. Just wait. Don't steal it. steel? no steal. yes. steal. right? ugh!
After this past week, I realized that I'm far further on the road that is referred to as Emotional Maturity than I thought. This realization came when a very dear friend, probably my best friend up here in the land of penguins and Eskimos*, lied to me about something very important. Both myself and a 3rd person who were involved in this just plain ridiculous situation were strangely mature about it. Even just 2 years ago, I would have flipped out and gone crazy. But instead I was irrationally calm; I didn't even know why I was so calm while I was being calm. I mean don't get me wrong, I definitely had my mild outburst of violence after letting the whole situation settle. 2% of the time, my punches actually inflict pain--winning! But, initially and even now, I can only see the situation in a rational way and learn from it. I'm still #@$(%$&# pissed and disappointed, but life is too short to dwell on things you can neither control nor change. So you might as well learn from them, try your damnedest to forgive, and move on a stronger woman (or man--whichever is reading this--if anyone). I really wish I could document what happened on here, but both of the other two people involved are great friends and I don't want to do that to them. Just know it's a good one--we'll leave it at that.
So back to this emotional maturity nonsense. Most of you know I tend to act like a...well...12-year-old boy. That's what she said jokes are probably my favorite thing on the planet. I say inappropriate things when appropriate (figure that one out). Basically the main differences between me and your average 12-year-old boy are that I don't think my best friend's big sister is hot (because I am that big sister type that 12-year-old boys love for some reason), I've already gone through puberty (praise baby Jesus!), and I don't smell perpetually bad (unless I'm wearing a hat--you know I haven't showered if I'm wearing a hat).
So I like to have fun. I like to do and say silly things and act a fool. I like to ride rollercoasters and scream at the top of my lungs. I find fainting goats hilarious and am pretty sure I could spend an entire day on youtube watching America's Funniest Home Videos clips and laughing babies and funny animals. But somehow I'm still able to be professional at work, am able to have intellectual conversations with adults, somehow have intellectual conversations with my niece (genius child), and have real relationships with people. This has made me ponder: how is it possible that I can carry on a normal life as a real person and yet still be my ridonkulous, goofy self 99% of the time? I still don't know the answer to the question, but I'll keep the "kid at heart" thing going anyway--it works on me. But after this past week, I'm happy to know that I'm emotionally mature and stable. It's quite comforting to know that after some of the cow poop (i genuinely wanted to use an alternate set of covabulary**) that people have done, I can still walk away a stronger woman. Go Dani!! I get a cookie...or not...because I'm on one of my healthy eating kicks...guhhhh.
Done and done.
*Yes I know summer is coming and Boston is awesome in the summer. But I'm from TN--I'm allowed to make arctic and Eskimo jokes for anything farther north than the Mason Dixon line.
**regarding my new word I just created. That was a typo. I went back and fixed it initially, but then realized that's awesome and Webster's should adopt it. I'm going to be a billionaire after that one. Just wait. Don't steal it. steel? no steal. yes. steal. right? ugh!
Monday, April 30, 2012
Getting old sucks
This is inspired by a recent conversation with one of my awesomely sarcastic and humorous friends.
Getting old sucks. Why? Well there are the obvious reasons:
1. organ function decline
2. wrinkles
3. gray hair
4. incontinence
5. memory loss
6. funny breath syndrome, etc
Don't get me wrong, I love old people--my patients are old. They are pretty funny and they have some fantastic stories. I'm talking about the old when you aren't really old at all but you start to feel older.
Below are 4 reasons (of the many that exist) that getting old sucks...
Getting Old Sucks Reason #1--Activity ability
In high school, I was crazily active. Here's a quick rundown:
1. academic overachiever (hello 4.0 and Valedictorian)
2. danced ballet 4-5 nights a week (should have just moved a cot into the studio)
3. on the swim team (what up mediocre freestyler)
4. in the marching band (you can laugh for 5 seconds starting now: 5...4...3...2...1. Now stop. And also, if you've ever been to band camp you know that it is more like boot camp. It should seriously be a 1 week weight loss plan...go ahead and say your dirty jokes...)
So the point of the above now-what-seems-unnecessary summary describing my high school day-to-day schedule is that I was entirely too active. I should have been getting into trouble, but instead my Mother was one of those moms that decided the way to keep me out of trouble was to keep me occupied by as many activities as possible. She's smart because I definitely would have gotten distracted by trouble had I gotten even remotely bored.
Mom-1; Teenage hormones and rebellion-0.
Now I am 25 and am still very active compared to a lot of people, but I can't do nearly what I used to. So you all know that I dance like 10 days a week (figure that one out). Well I also enjoy running, especially around Boston in the summer. The Nike+ app on my iTouch makes me smile inside. Focus Dani. So I try to run as often as I can--ends up being about 2-3 days a week. I ran yesterday and didn't warm up enough and ended up tweaking my freakin Achilles tendon. So annoying. So I told my Mom about it and her response was, "Dani, you need to stop pushing your body so hard. You aren't 17 anymore." Thanks Ma. I'm a quarter of a century--appreciate the reminder.
Getting Old Sucks Reason #2--Beverage Consumption
In college, I could definitely handle my beverages. Keeping up with the boys was something that turned into a regular challenge for me. Challenge accepted. I usually succeeded...usually (you might be lucky enough to hear some of the unsuccessful challenges at some point--funny is an understatement). Now, I'm good to go after 2 or 3 beverages. Unless it is Jack D who is my best friend. It's ridiculous. And hangovers are basically expected with even just a few drinks--hence the reason I don't drink very often anymore.
Getting Old Sucks Reason #3--Cliche Grown-Up Phrases
My niece is THE coolest kid on the planet. She is 4-years-old and already sarcastic and sassy. There will be many stories of her I'm sure. You're welcome. Most awesome kid ever award goes to her. But because she is the love of my life, I'm super protective and irrational sometimes. I find myself saying things like, "When you're my age, don't do this." or "Someday you are going to think boys are cute. They'll have to deal with me first." or "Yes, I like Justin Bieber too." wait...what? Nevermind...
Getting Old Sucks Reason #4--Minivans
I don't care how old I get--I will NEVER own a minivan. In fact, minivans should be outlawed. Minivans are only useful if you are the Octomom (on a side note--google tried to correct octomom to stockroom. I'm so proud of google for not acknowledging octomom as an actual word.) and she should be outlawed too. Another thing--and some of you have heard me rant about this before--stick figure car decals. Really people? Really? Nobody cares that you have 3 boys and 1 girl. The boys play hockey, soccer, and read a lot and the girl likes butterflies. You have 2 dogs--1 big 1 small and another big dog that is in dog heaven. And that you dress like a soccer mom in Velour and you apparently live on a farm. I might start going undercover and taking the stupid decals off people's cars. You are NEVER EVER old enough to put them on your window. Outlawed.
Here's the deal though homeslices. Age is just a number. In my opinion (obviously it's my opinion--it's my blog), you should push as hard as your body can take it. Do as much as you can while you are still able.
In conclusion--getting old sucks because your body stops working as well, you want to sleep all the time, your liver decides it wants to be lazy, and you're expected to own a minivan equipped with stupid TMI stick figure decals. Not okay, people. Not. Okay.
Getting old sucks. Why? Well there are the obvious reasons:
1. organ function decline
2. wrinkles
3. gray hair
4. incontinence
5. memory loss
6. funny breath syndrome, etc
Don't get me wrong, I love old people--my patients are old. They are pretty funny and they have some fantastic stories. I'm talking about the old when you aren't really old at all but you start to feel older.
Below are 4 reasons (of the many that exist) that getting old sucks...
Getting Old Sucks Reason #1--Activity ability
In high school, I was crazily active. Here's a quick rundown:
1. academic overachiever (hello 4.0 and Valedictorian)
2. danced ballet 4-5 nights a week (should have just moved a cot into the studio)
3. on the swim team (what up mediocre freestyler)
4. in the marching band (you can laugh for 5 seconds starting now: 5...4...3...2...1. Now stop. And also, if you've ever been to band camp you know that it is more like boot camp. It should seriously be a 1 week weight loss plan...go ahead and say your dirty jokes...)
So the point of the above now-what-seems-unnecessary summary describing my high school day-to-day schedule is that I was entirely too active. I should have been getting into trouble, but instead my Mother was one of those moms that decided the way to keep me out of trouble was to keep me occupied by as many activities as possible. She's smart because I definitely would have gotten distracted by trouble had I gotten even remotely bored.
Mom-1; Teenage hormones and rebellion-0.
Now I am 25 and am still very active compared to a lot of people, but I can't do nearly what I used to. So you all know that I dance like 10 days a week (figure that one out). Well I also enjoy running, especially around Boston in the summer. The Nike+ app on my iTouch makes me smile inside. Focus Dani. So I try to run as often as I can--ends up being about 2-3 days a week. I ran yesterday and didn't warm up enough and ended up tweaking my freakin Achilles tendon. So annoying. So I told my Mom about it and her response was, "Dani, you need to stop pushing your body so hard. You aren't 17 anymore." Thanks Ma. I'm a quarter of a century--appreciate the reminder.
Getting Old Sucks Reason #2--Beverage Consumption
In college, I could definitely handle my beverages. Keeping up with the boys was something that turned into a regular challenge for me. Challenge accepted. I usually succeeded...usually (you might be lucky enough to hear some of the unsuccessful challenges at some point--funny is an understatement). Now, I'm good to go after 2 or 3 beverages. Unless it is Jack D who is my best friend. It's ridiculous. And hangovers are basically expected with even just a few drinks--hence the reason I don't drink very often anymore.
Getting Old Sucks Reason #3--Cliche Grown-Up Phrases
My niece is THE coolest kid on the planet. She is 4-years-old and already sarcastic and sassy. There will be many stories of her I'm sure. You're welcome. Most awesome kid ever award goes to her. But because she is the love of my life, I'm super protective and irrational sometimes. I find myself saying things like, "When you're my age, don't do this." or "Someday you are going to think boys are cute. They'll have to deal with me first." or "Yes, I like Justin Bieber too." wait...what? Nevermind...
Getting Old Sucks Reason #4--Minivans
I don't care how old I get--I will NEVER own a minivan. In fact, minivans should be outlawed. Minivans are only useful if you are the Octomom (on a side note--google tried to correct octomom to stockroom. I'm so proud of google for not acknowledging octomom as an actual word.) and she should be outlawed too. Another thing--and some of you have heard me rant about this before--stick figure car decals. Really people? Really? Nobody cares that you have 3 boys and 1 girl. The boys play hockey, soccer, and read a lot and the girl likes butterflies. You have 2 dogs--1 big 1 small and another big dog that is in dog heaven. And that you dress like a soccer mom in Velour and you apparently live on a farm. I might start going undercover and taking the stupid decals off people's cars. You are NEVER EVER old enough to put them on your window. Outlawed.
Here's the deal though homeslices. Age is just a number. In my opinion (obviously it's my opinion--it's my blog), you should push as hard as your body can take it. Do as much as you can while you are still able.
In conclusion--getting old sucks because your body stops working as well, you want to sleep all the time, your liver decides it wants to be lazy, and you're expected to own a minivan equipped with stupid TMI stick figure decals. Not okay, people. Not. Okay.
Friday, April 27, 2012
Rant #1-Driving INabilities
Boston drivers...
Need I say more really? Abso-freakin-lutely.
How is it possible for you to change lanes when I am in plain sight right next to you? Dude, I'm not even in your blind spot. There is another Dunkin Donuts 100 feet away--I promise. You don't have to run me off the road to make sure you get into that specific Dunkies. I know Mia the Kia (a.k.a. my awesome car) is small, but she is feisty like her owner--tread carefully. And for all that is holy in this world, pay attention to your surroundings!
Why do you beep the horn the millisecond the light changes green? More importantly, how do you move so quickly? You should be an Olympian because your hand-eye coordination is top tier if you can move your hand that quickly. I certainly cannot move my feet that quickly and I'm a dancer. I'm not even mad, I'm impressed. (name that movie...and GO! If you don't know, stop being my friend...just kidding, sort of.)
Listen, I like your city--it is becoming my city. But just stop it. It's highly annoying and makes me want to sucker punch you in the kidney. Yes, sucker punch, not just normal punch. And yes, kidney, because it sounds cooler. I am very aware that it would be extremely painful.
Drivers' Ed 101: If you see a ball rolling across the street, there is bound to be a happy, little mini-person running behind it. This is also something called common sense. Very advanced concept.
Okay have I given Bostonians enough hell yet? Oh my bad, Bahstonians.
P.S. I really do love you. I just strongly hate your driving abilities/inabilities. Take your pick.
-Me
Need I say more really? Abso-freakin-lutely.
How is it possible for you to change lanes when I am in plain sight right next to you? Dude, I'm not even in your blind spot. There is another Dunkin Donuts 100 feet away--I promise. You don't have to run me off the road to make sure you get into that specific Dunkies. I know Mia the Kia (a.k.a. my awesome car) is small, but she is feisty like her owner--tread carefully. And for all that is holy in this world, pay attention to your surroundings!
Why do you beep the horn the millisecond the light changes green? More importantly, how do you move so quickly? You should be an Olympian because your hand-eye coordination is top tier if you can move your hand that quickly. I certainly cannot move my feet that quickly and I'm a dancer. I'm not even mad, I'm impressed. (name that movie...and GO! If you don't know, stop being my friend...just kidding, sort of.)
Listen, I like your city--it is becoming my city. But just stop it. It's highly annoying and makes me want to sucker punch you in the kidney. Yes, sucker punch, not just normal punch. And yes, kidney, because it sounds cooler. I am very aware that it would be extremely painful.
Drivers' Ed 101: If you see a ball rolling across the street, there is bound to be a happy, little mini-person running behind it. This is also something called common sense. Very advanced concept.
Okay have I given Bostonians enough hell yet? Oh my bad, Bahstonians.
P.S. I really do love you. I just strongly hate your driving abilities/inabilities. Take your pick.
-Me
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
Round 2 at this blogging thing
So about 30 minutes ago, I decided I should start a blog because I have all of these thoughts scurry through my brain, and I figured some of them should be written down. When I went to google to start a blog, I was surprised to find I already have one--whoops. My memory is not the greatest...never has been; but it's been worse the last couple of weeks since I got a self-diagnosed mild concussion...story to follow possibly.
Anyway, back in 2010 when I started this blog, I was:
Before we get started, here are a few things about me:
1. Longwinded? nahhh. okay. yes. get over it.
2. I enjoy awkward moments. In fact, I flourish in an awkward situation.
3. The words "You're welcome" come out of my mouth at unwarranted times. I just think the look on people's faces is priceless when you say you're welcome and didn't actually do anything or did something that they aren't really happy about or when they didn't say thank you.
4. Ellipses are precious. I'm trying to distance myself from this cute little punctuation as I am a professional now, but sometimes they sneak in to play.
5. If I get political (which my goal is to NOT get political), I lean to the left...pretty liberal. Don't read those if you don't agree.
6. I'm an avid dancer so most of my posts will involve dancing or other dancers in some way. Classically trained in ballet. Also trained in jazz. I am able to dance most of the ballrooms (chacha, foxtrot, waltz, samba, tango, rumba, bolero, etc.). I fell in love with Salsa, bachata, etc. in 2010. But in 2011, West Coast Swing took over my life. So if you see WCS, that means West Coast Swing. Get used to it. I have an addiction.
You'll learn other things as time goes on I guess. I tend to be an open book and give way too much information, or TMI as those kids call it now-a-days. (Oh and I pretend I'm old...)
Anyway, back in 2010 when I started this blog, I was:
- living in Tennessee
- had recently become single
- was in grad school for Epidemiology
- and was trying to figure out my next steps in life
- living in Boston
- am still single after a few random dates
- have my MPH
- and am still trying to figure out my next steps in life
Before we get started, here are a few things about me:
1. Longwinded? nahhh. okay. yes. get over it.
2. I enjoy awkward moments. In fact, I flourish in an awkward situation.
3. The words "You're welcome" come out of my mouth at unwarranted times. I just think the look on people's faces is priceless when you say you're welcome and didn't actually do anything or did something that they aren't really happy about or when they didn't say thank you.
4. Ellipses are precious. I'm trying to distance myself from this cute little punctuation as I am a professional now, but sometimes they sneak in to play.
5. If I get political (which my goal is to NOT get political), I lean to the left...pretty liberal. Don't read those if you don't agree.
6. I'm an avid dancer so most of my posts will involve dancing or other dancers in some way. Classically trained in ballet. Also trained in jazz. I am able to dance most of the ballrooms (chacha, foxtrot, waltz, samba, tango, rumba, bolero, etc.). I fell in love with Salsa, bachata, etc. in 2010. But in 2011, West Coast Swing took over my life. So if you see WCS, that means West Coast Swing. Get used to it. I have an addiction.
You'll learn other things as time goes on I guess. I tend to be an open book and give way too much information, or TMI as those kids call it now-a-days. (Oh and I pretend I'm old...)
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